Can We talk?
To say it’s been more than a hot minute since my last blog post would be the understatement of the year.
But trust me when I say I’ve been working.
I’ve been doing some of the most difficult work there is.
Working on me. In therapy.
Doing necessary work. Trauma work.
Because here’s what I know. Despite my mental illness diagnosis (I have a few), despite my trauma, despite my struggle - thriving is possible.
In fact - thriving is part of my calling. Part of my purpose.
But just like a plant can’t thrive with all the right ingredients - healthy soil, water, sunshine, shade - we can’t thrive without the right ingredients.
And part of the right ingredients for me has included therapy. My own personal kind of botanist.
I’ve been digging in deep to release pain, find forgiveness and believe in my worth.
Can I say I have fully arrived at the time of writing this? No. Freaking. Way.
Who knows - I may never fully arrive on this side of heaven. But I have learned some invaluable lessons through therapy that I’d like to share with you.
My Key Takeaways From Therapy
Ask for help. They only way to recharge through therapy - which is necessary to keep making gains - is to ask for help. Get a cleaning lady, find a babysitter, use a meal delivery service. What every gives you the time and space to process, recover and be ready for the next session.
Show up and face the music. Focus on the process of healing and not the final result. Often, it does get worse before it gets better as you face the things that have kept you captive. But it’s in that where you find your freedom ultimately.
Become aware of your thought patterns. Overtime some of our self limiting beliefs have become so ingrained that we operate on autopilot in response to them. It's time to identify them, call them out and replace them.
Forgiveness is necessary. Healing requires letting go of the poison of unforgiveness. But don;t get it twisted. Forgiveness does NOT:
Mean the memory is gone
Remove the consequences of wrongdoing
Rebuild trust
Result in reconciliation on it’s own
5. Celebrate all your victories. Even if they seem small. Here’s the thing. You are
doing hard work. Asking for help? Showing up? Facing your vulnerabilities? Fighting
back against negative thought patterns? Learning forgiveness? That’s hard stuff. It’s
why most don’t do it. But you are doing it. Never forget or discount the hard work.
Celebrate it.
Aren’t in therapy but have considered it?
Do it girl. A thousand percent. Do it.
Find one that you connect with. One who is trained specifically for the type of therapy YOU need. And trust God to show up in the process with you as you allow him to work through someone else.
It doesn’t mean you have less faith. It doesn’t mean you are weak. It doesn’t mean that you are more broken than others.
It means that you have finally realized that we are not meant to be able to do everything alone. That’s why we have teachers, coaches, trainers, doctors, hairdressers (do NOT cut your own bangs babe).
And yes - therapists too.